How do I tell them I am a Junglist at a job interview?

Off-Topic | Jan 10, 2017

  1. Noise-Signal Diphallic Dude

    Noise-Signal

    Noise-Signal Diphallic Dude

    2,785 posts
    Since Apr 2, 2014
    I need the following questions answered because I need to know how to come out as a junglist at an interview...

    What hand shake should I use?

    Which clothing should I wear Stussy, bomber jacket, or camo knickers and a wife beater?

    How many times should I big up the interviewer?

    Should I slag them off for poor benefits or supporting new instead of old-school Ram?

    Should I print my CV on a dubplate?

    Is it ok for an American to say bruv?
  2. Sidius, Kabal, Rogue Trooper and 4 others like this.

    Brecht Conserve Powered Onanist

    Brecht

    Brecht Conserve Powered Onanist

    29,801 posts
    Since Mar 5, 2004
    Turn up with a spliff and a red stripe
    Sidius, Kabal, Rogue Trooper and 4 others like this.
  3. Jimmy Crack likes this.

    Full Monty

    Full Monty

    Full Monty

    643 posts
    Since Mar 31, 2014
    Just make sure not to have a shower a week in advance. That will do it.
    Jimmy Crack likes this.
  4. BillyTheClit FUCK OFF!

    BillyTheClit

    BillyTheClit FUCK OFF!

    4,469 posts
    Since Nov 29, 2006
    Can you MC?
    You could answer all questions that way.
  5. Alert1 and Transient Energy like this.

    Subliminal-Message Dystopian DNB Producer

    Subliminal-Message

    Subliminal-Message Dystopian DNB Producer

    205 posts
    Since Aug 25, 2015
  6. Brecht Conserve Powered Onanist

    Brecht

    Brecht Conserve Powered Onanist

    29,801 posts
    Since Mar 5, 2004
    hahahahaha that would be so epic.
  7. Alert1 likes this.

    Randall Cunningham

    Randall Cunningham

    Randall Cunningham

    2,355 posts
    Since Apr 11, 2010
    "DNB, You know DNB, its like fast dubstep"
    Alert1 likes this.
  8. benj b rock

    benj b

    benj b rock

    4,905 posts
    Since Jul 2, 2002
    Do it! And film it.
  9. Kabal, R0llin, DJ_Klame and 2 others like this.

    darf-fader 2001 or STFU

    darf-fader

    darf-fader 2001 or STFU

    8,287 posts
    Since Dec 11, 2001
    It's all about how you answer the questions...

    Example: If you need to give a negative answer instead of simply saying no you could say "Nah-nee-nee-woh-oh, zig-ee-nah-nah-no-no-no" instead.
    Kabal, R0llin, DJ_Klame and 2 others like this.
  10. Tipsy_McStagger

    Tipsy_McStagger

    Tipsy_McStagger

    2,319 posts
    Since May 9, 2012
    Make sure you do a few bumps and smoke a fat one beforehand also.
  11. Rogue Trooper and Alert1 like this.

    Transient Energy Paranoid Android

    Transient Energy

    Transient Energy Paranoid Android

    7,826 posts
    Since May 8, 2004
    Be really non committal and shifty until they ask about your other interests, when they do play Clipz - Slippery Slopes as loud as your phone will allow, then high five them all, then leave.
    Rogue Trooper and Alert1 like this.
  12. Br4ss P!g30n likes this.

    C-qnz

    C-qnz

    C-qnz

    179 posts
    Since Apr 22, 2008
    :ana: Tell them you're a Badman, but in a positive way
    Br4ss P!g30n likes this.
  13. Adone and Kabal like this.

    Jimmy Crack

    Jimmy Crack

    Jimmy Crack

    2,473 posts
    Since Nov 3, 2015
    Be very unimpressed and wear some ear plugs.


    Set your alarm to go off every 5 min with dope tracks for each. Your crew needs you your very loyal tell them.
    Adone and Kabal like this.
  14. Jimmy Crack, Kabal and Neurox like this.

    BillyTheClit FUCK OFF!

    BillyTheClit

    BillyTheClit FUCK OFF!

    4,469 posts
    Since Nov 29, 2006
    Bring a homie and call it a double drop.
    Or say this is me B2B Kevin (or whoever)...
    Jimmy Crack, Kabal and Neurox like this.
  15. Adone, Br4ss P!g30n, DJ_Klame and 2 others like this.

    invalid.user yep

    invalid.user

    invalid.user yep

    1,320 posts
    Since Jan 30, 2010
    [​IMG]
    Adone, Br4ss P!g30n, DJ_Klame and 2 others like this.
  16. sato

    sato

    sato

    905 posts
    Since Sep 1, 2008
    :laughing::appl:
  17. monkey phantom

    monkey

    monkey phantom

    23,120 posts
    Since May 20, 2001
    insta rewind on your best answers :fire:
  18. darf-fader 2001 or STFU

    darf-fader

    darf-fader 2001 or STFU

    8,287 posts
    Since Dec 11, 2001
    Make sure to shout "Lickwood" first:spliff:
  19. Vincent Drug (Amos_Keato)

    Vincent Drug

    Vincent Drug (Amos_Keato)

    1,438 posts
    Since Dec 23, 2004
    Tell them you're very appreciative of the interview and that you're determined not to let this opportunity slip through your fing slip through your fing slip though your fing...

    Check for knowing nods / smirks.
  20. twenty 3

    twenty 3

    twenty 3

    1,927 posts
    Since Jun 1, 2004
  21. cool mr croc een bolleke alstublieft

    cool mr croc

    cool mr croc een bolleke alstublieft

    33,040 posts
    Since Apr 12, 2004
  22. Kabal likes this.

    Noise-Signal Diphallic Dude

    Noise-Signal

    Noise-Signal Diphallic Dude

    2,785 posts
    Since Apr 2, 2014
    Should I use Nicky Blackmarket as a reference?
    Kabal likes this.
  23. Jimmy Crack likes this.

    Rogue Trooper Giant Smurf

    Rogue Trooper

    Rogue Trooper Giant Smurf

    5,329 posts
    Since Jan 22, 2004
    Do your olive parka all the way up to the top and look off to the distance in a disinterested somewhat hostile look on your face, then fist-bump the interviewer while saying BRAP loudly and follow up with a big up ya ches' rudebwoy. Then imagine the sickest tune has dropped and pull your best bassface.

    [​IMG]
    Jimmy Crack likes this.
  24. ChavXL Drinking the banner ads

    ChavXL

    ChavXL Drinking the banner ads

    33,539 posts
    Since Feb 6, 2005
    is it for a manamanamananagement role?
  25. mmghost likes this.

    Kabal Professional Procrastinator

    Kabal

    Kabal Professional Procrastinator

    331 posts
    Since Mar 30, 2016
    Make sure you comment on how much better jobs were in the old days, and how all jobs are the same now.
    mmghost likes this.
  26. Adone likes this.

    Kabal Professional Procrastinator

    Kabal

    Kabal Professional Procrastinator

    331 posts
    Since Mar 30, 2016
    (this thread is gold btw)
    Adone likes this.
  27. Jimmy Crack, Roachie and Kabal like this.

    Vydx

    Vydx

    Vydx

    2,520 posts
    Since Jul 13, 2014
    If you don't understand their question the first time just go "Wheel and come again please please please"
    Jimmy Crack, Roachie and Kabal like this.
  28. phreeky, Vydx and R0llin like this.

    Paravoid

    Paravoid

    Paravoid

    3,373 posts
    Since Mar 22, 2015
    If he makes a remarc just give him a Thunderslap.
    phreeky, Vydx and R0llin like this.
  29. Paravoid

    Paravoid

    Paravoid

    3,373 posts
    Since Mar 22, 2015
    [​IMG]
  30. Rogue Trooper likes this.

    Sidius AKA Tryptich

    Sidius

    Sidius AKA Tryptich

    13,824 posts
    Since Jun 1, 2003
    Answer all of their questions with a quick toot on this.


    [​IMG]
    Rogue Trooper likes this.
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